i still felt that here is a better place for me to express my feeling.
this two days, i went home. i was not on mood of studying although exam is nearby. Therefore, i was searching for any blog to read. And i found one which title 'heart kl'. the things he post is great. i read all his blog and surprisingly that what he interesting in was what i thinking always. i wish to contact him and tell him that i also interest on all the topic he post. and wish to chat and know him also. Donno how he look like....hihi.... Therefore, i ask myself....Am i gay? (This question was confusing me for some quite a time). I think i am. But, i still dont brave enough to admit. there many things that i need to consider. (should i consider???) i really confuse...confuse...confuse....Sometime, i try to become straight again by watching porn movie. But, i realise that i focus more on the guy than the dude. Then, at last i turn to watch gay porn movie again. so.......what should i do?......continue like this or really go meet some gay friends? can my family accept it? can my friends accept it? is this can suit with what i studying (profession course) now?
this make me cant concentrate my study....make me always blur and think blank during reading and even sleep......GOD pls help me!!!! Should i tell someone that i trust? Should i go find CK (my friend who is gay) for help? SHould i tell my family first before i go find him?
Now...i really confuse like mad....
Headache....headache....headache......
any one can give me some comment? i really sick of it......
And i really pending of love esp from guys......;(
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